“The baby doesn’t appear to have turned”.
My baby was breech, sitting comfortably upright with its little head tucked under my rib cage. I imagined a baked potato sized head.
“Has the option of a C-section been discussed with you?”, the midwife said.
I longed for the natural, hippy birth I had been reading about. No pain relief, just focus and breathing…
Someone suggested spinning babies …herbal remedies, moxibustion and various yoga positions. I knew a vaginal birth was possible, but it posed more difficulties for mother and midwife, and I didn’t want to be selfish – I had dreamed for and wanted a baby for so long, I couldn’t have any risks.
It was around 37 weeks it was confirmed and I had a one way ticket to a C-section, which was going to be at 39+3. It was nice to have a date and the baby would be delivered safely and in the hands of experts, but I did feel a little robbed of my whole birthing experience.
I began to question – Am I still giving birth if it’s a C-section? Or is it just surgery? Like having an operation? I wouldn’t go into labour or have contractions, but like a wisdom tooth, the baby would be extracted from my body and handed to me…
How wrong I was. The experience was wonderful (and terrifying). The night before was like Christmas Eve, I packed my bag, tidied the house and got all the bits and bobs done as I knew I would be out of action for a while after surgery. It was a strange feeling, knowing, ‘this time tomorrow…’
I arrived at hospital early, around 7am. It was warm and quiet. The baby doctor came in and went through some forms and answered any questions – she would be the one delivering my baby. I liked her. I got into my gown and pulled up the circulation socks. After a little while, I said goodbye to my husband and was walked to theatre.
The injections hurt and there were quite a few. I began to tremble, feeling overwhelmed and scared. The theatre was cold and strange but the nurses were warm and friendly – it all feels surreal when I think back.
The doctor and nurses updated my husband and I as they operated, letting us know their progress. At one point, the operating table felt like turbulence, as I was shook from side to side – they have to work quickly and thoroughly.
We knew she was here when they doctor said, “We have a bottom!” and out she came, wrapped in a towel, snug and safe, and handed over to my husband. Our little precious safe and sound x